My thoughts: The Penn State Allegations

In the midst of the unfortunate Penn State scandal unfolding, I have been listening to radio interviews, reading court documents, and watching media outlets radio interviews, to stay abreast of the allegations brought fourth against Jerry Sandusky, the former Penn State defensive coordinator and founder of The Second Mile non-profit organization. It is with Great disgust as a victim of child molestation, as a sports fan, and as a human being that I need to speak my piece on this matter.

As I first heard the news a few weeks ago about the Penn State Scandal, my feelings have even developed into much more anger and disgust. Here you have a grown man, a major figure at a highly ranked university, a non profit organizer, who had the audacity to take advantage of underprivileged children to which the organization was supposed to be helping. The Second Mile's tag-line reads-"Providing Children with Help and Hope," and their mission-"To help young people, particularly those in need to achieve their potential." Sandusky clearly did not succeed in the organization's mission, in fact, he provided more reason for those young individuals to suffer more and be worse off than when they came to the organization for the help they were supposedly going to be provided with. Mr. Sandusky, sexual abuse is not the way you provide children and young youth with the opportunity to reach their potential. You took away those innocent years by enforcing your sick demonic ways onto them.

I sat here this evening and listened to the Rock Center interview Sandusky conducted via telephone with Bob Costas and could not believe what I was hearing. He stated on a few occasions in the interview that he showered with young boys. Whom in their right mind would shower with young children and think that its ok? Bob Costas asked if he had a liking for young boys and he couldn't answer that question straight up. Sandusky says, "I enjoy young people's company"...what the fuck? Nah, that isn't going to fly Mr. Sandusky. When asked if the grad intern caught you in the shower having sexual intercourse you said no but I did take a shower with the child and "horse played" around with him, slapping him on his but with a towel. When asked if it were true if a janitor caught him performing oral sex on a child, Sandusky says that's not true. Bob Costa asked, "well why would these people that say they caught you lie and say these things" Sandusky says, I don't know you'd have to ask them. Not very convincing or the sounds of innocence at all! Nor is this normal behavior for a grown man.

Please let me not forget the Graduate assistant that allegedly saw these actions taking place. I guess he thought he did the right thing by going to tell Joe Paterno about what he saw. No, fail again Penn State alum. What he should have done was go and whoop Sanduky's ass on sight, then call the cops. That's sure ass hell what I would have done or any other morally and ethically sane human being. In my opinion he is just as sick as Sandusky. Moving on from the grad assistant, let me go to the head coach, Mr. Paterno. Mr. Paterno, the face of the institution, decided to go to the Athletic Director and say something. Did it not occur to him that this is of a serious matter and needed to be handled as such. What could have gone through these people minds as they received this type of news and did not go straight to authorities? It seems they all felt as if the reputation of the university, the reputation of those adult individuals was more important than the lives of those children. What is done in the dark comes to light. Karma is a mutha! As they all are witnessing now.

As, I may have stronger feelings than most in regards to this issue, I know that mostly everyone out there can understand how child sexual abuse affects children from the time of the occurrence of the abuse until adulthood and even further. As in most cases of abuse, and especially when there are public figures and institutions involved, the victims are overlooked. Penn State's reputation and image has been rocked, Joe Paterno's legacy has been tarnished, but those victims will forever remain with the horrific reality of what took place in their childhood and is now being exposed publicly.

I believe in speaking out in order to raise awareness for child sexual abuse. This is an epidemic that continues to spread rapidly. It is shun upon in many cultures and not talked about. But the truth of the matter remains that child sexual abuse happens more often than anyone thinks and wants to acknowledge. Every six minutes, a child is sexually abused in this country. Two-hundred forty children are sexually abused each day. One in four girls and one in six boys are sexually abused before their 18th birthday. So, as we go about our everyday lives and do our normal activities, there is a child somewhere out there being sexually abused, being robbed of their innocence, and changing their lives forever. Just think, it may even be happening or has happened in your family. What will it take for you to stand against child sexual abuse?

ADDICTION

Growing up I saw a lot of relatives in my family become addicted to drugs. I've witnessed family members steal from other family members because of addiction. Sometimes those same items that were stolen were sold to other family members because of addiction. I've experienced rent not being paid and having to move out of the apartment because of addiction. I've experienced not having groceries in the home because of addiction. I've experienced having to chain my bike up to a bed post because of addiction. Still, that metal chain was sawed off, bike stolen, and sold because of addiction. I've witnessed the smell of addiction, not a pleasant smell at all. I've witnessed checks stolen, signature forged, and check cashed because of addiction. I've witnessed having to carry my first leather jacket down the street in a black plastic bag to my grandmother's house so that it wouldn't be stolen if left home because of addiction. I've experienced playing my Nintendo (boy how I loved that game) when it first came out, up all night with an addict. Loving every moment. Then years later, I experienced that same Nintendo and the games stolen and sold by that same addict because of addiction. I've witnessed addicts selling their foodstamps, not some but all, because of addiction. I've wittnessed someone burn down their home because of addiciton. I've witnessed people going into rehab, being clean for a while, and going right back, because of addiction. I've witnessed being embarrassed of a parent and not wanting to acknowledge him or her because of addiction.
These are just some of the things that I remember about addiction. Addiction affects everyone that is involved-the addict, family, and friends. Whether it be alcohol, crack, heroin, marijuana or whatever the drug of choice maybe addiction is addiction. Having experienced a parent and other relatives being addicts,I couldn't see myself subcumbing to addiction. I know how detrimental addiction is to one's personal health, personal life, and family life not to ever want to re-live that. I was fortunate. Some people pick up the same cycle because that's all they know. I was lucky enough to have one parent and other family members that were head strong and showed me a different way.
See, I don't know what the singer, songwriter Amy Winehouse went through in her childhood or adulthood but it overwhelmed her and allowed addiction to take over. I am so happy that through all those experiences, Still I Rise, from addiction.

Our Voice

Most recently, I went to an informal meeting of young leaders within the Rochester community, that discussed ways in which we can make this community better for us and most importantly for future generations. As I listened respectfully and intuitively, there were things that I learned that I didn't know and perhaps that others within our community didn't know about mayoral candidates Tom Richards and former mayor Bill Johnson. I learned a little bit more about what our city has to offer and what our city can offer but doesn't. One thing that I learned which for me is the most important, was the fact that our voices are needed to be heard in order for change to take place. As a people, we must speak out against what is wrong. We, and myself included, must take action and voice our opinions and concerns about what is going on in this community which does not benefit us in order to at least put things on an even playing field. No, this isn't a white vs black issue but it is a right vs wrong issue. When we as African Americans get mistreated, misinformed, & misjudged because of our skin color we have to do something about it. The question we must all ask ourselves in such situations is, who will take on the responsibilities to bring about change in our community? Our ancestors took on the social responsibility to take the lead in order for us to have the opportunities that we have today. Why has that changed so much? Why haven't we as a people took on those responsibilities of sacrificing for the generations to come like our ancestors did? Are we afraid of prison and death? Why, when the fact of the matter remains that our ancestors died for us to be here today and to have the luxuries that we have. When I say luxuries I am not referring to cars, clothes, and jewelry. Luxuries such as education, health care, jobs & equal rights, to name a few. The luxuries that we so often take for granted.
So, lets start to take a stand, speak out, & voice our concerns for what is going on in this community so that we can have a better tomorrow for not only ourselves but for generations to come.

RCSD

On January 27, 2010 I had to present a five minute speech in my Public Speaking class. We were able to choose any topic to present before the class. I chose to do my presentation on the Rochester City School District. Below you will find my speech in its entirety.

Well, my presentation today will focus on RCSD: This stands for The Rochester City School District. As a former Rochester City School District student I would like to talk about a few issues that are discussed so often in the local media. I would like to give my take on these issues as I feel that not only should parents of students need to address these issues but citizens with no children (such as myself) need to address them too. I say this as a non-parent because those children are still the future generations of our community. If everyone does not get involved, parent or not, then the issues plaguing the community and the school district will not be fixable.
As a former student of the RCSD my journey began as a student at Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. School #9. I attended the school from Kindergarten through sixth grade. Back then, schools were grade appropriate. When I say grade appropriate, I mean that elementary schools were solely for elementary students; from Kindergarten through Sixth; Junior High or Middle School as it was called when I attended; was for 7th and 8th grade; and High School was 9th through 12th. The way that the city schools are integrated now, causes for too much interaction between small children and teens. In my opinion this is too chaotic. How can children learn effectively and efficiently when there is overcrowding in the schools?
Next, let me speak about the teachers. In my experience teachers were supportive and cared for their students. I can re-call those times when sometimes I would slip a bit on my grades. But I remember teachers, and in my case, one specific teacher, Mrs. J. She always made sure to inform not only my parents, but me as well, that I wasn’t doing my best. She would say, you can do better, or she needs to put forth more effort. Teachers would provide help and assistance where and when needed. Today it seems as if teachers do not express caring and supportive statements to students, or want to provide additional help. It seems that they have lost touch with what their purpose was for becoming a teacher. In my opinion, why become a teacher if it is not to help a child become a better student and to become a better individual? Lets face it; teachers don’t make that much money. I would think people would know this before pursuing this profession. So if you’re a teacher and you are not in the profession to help improve and educate a child’s life, then why become one? I believe teachers prior to even studying in college should do internships and volunteering in public schools to see if this is really where they would like to be five or so years from now. Then after internships and volunteering have been completed, a test should be conducted through college prep courses to evaluate their experience. Once college is completed more tests should be done to determine where these teachers should be placed and even if they should be teachers at all.
Perhaps the most important elements plaguing the negative overtones about RCSD, are the students. In this portion, I will combine the student and parents. Students need to understand and respect why they come to school; and that is to learn and develop their future. In order for students to have this respect and understanding, parents play the most important role in their development. Teaching first begins at home with the parents. If the parents are not teaching and enforcing rules in their household with their children, how do they expect them to go outside of the home to become productive students? Everything first starts at home. So parents please play your part and regulate before sending your child out to be regulated.
And students, you are not off the hook by any means. As a student you have a responsibility to be a student. That is to learn, and to be respectable to your peers and teachers. The student needs to understand that they will not become successful without education. So why go to school to act up and take learning for granted? Education is your key to success and it is ultimately up to you, the student, to see your education through.
Please remember that these thoughts are solely my opinion and not the opinions of parents, teachers, students, or school board members.

Your Life Purpose

Most of us have dreams and aspirations that we desire in our lives. By taking the proper steps through education & life experiences is how we potentially accomplish our dreams, aspirations, and goals. However, sometimes through these same methods, we do not achieve our personal goals; instead we find out our true purpose in life. Our true purpose in life is determined by God. I myself have many desires to accomplish many things. I have accomplished some of those things, some things I'm still pursuing, but the unknown is also what continues to drive me. God has a purpose for everyone. This does not mean that my purpose will be bestowed upon me by doing nothing and expecting God to give me what I want. I have to work hard for what I want, but through that work, I believe, that I will have placed before me those opportunities that will define my purpose.
You too have a purpose in life. You too must take steps that will help determine what that purpose in life is. However, God has the ultimate decision. So don't live your life not pursuing your personal goals, because if you do, then you will never be able to know truly what your life purpose will be. Stay positive, stay motivated, and stay blessed.

2010: My Year End Review

Ah, 2010, is almost over. What a year! As I reflect back on the year, I realize that I have so much to be thankful for. For the past few years, I always make a list of goals that I wish to accomplish throughout the year, and towards the end of that year, I look back at that list to see what I have accomplished, what is still in the works, and what I really need to re-focus on. I can say from that list, I was able to accomplish many of my goals. Through hard work and dedication, I was able to complete my Associate Degree from Empire State College in June. I was able to work on my credit and pay off some final bills (yeah!!!). Learning more about myself and enjoying my life the way I see fit, is always an accomplishment, but is always something that I strive to work on daily. I was also able to finish my documentary (December 2010) that I was working on for about a year prior. I was so relieved when this was done. I also started back at Empire State College in November to pursue my Bachelors Degree (can't stop won't stop).
Although, those are just a few accomplishments, there are some areas that I still continue to work on. Areas such as, eating healthier, & getting to work on time. See, the issue is knowing your problem, admitting it, and working on doing better at it. These I will continue to focus on in 2011 as they are a carry over from my 2010 list. I also strive to continue to work on my Entrepreneurial Business, Unique Vizunz. The documentary was completed and now I am working on my t-shirt line along with many other ideas that are in the works.!!!
Each year I always place on my list, which should be the first thing in this blog, is keeping God first, continuing to believe, and always count my blessings. At Memorial AME Zion Church, there are two magnet boards on each side of the church, one is called a request board, and the other I believe (don't quote me on this one) is called an answer wall (or something of that nature). A few years back I placed my magnet of the prayer hands on the request wall, as I needed a lot of guidance and prayers answered. Well, as those prayers were answered, I got to thinking and I realized that I didn't want to go over and switch those prayer hands to the answer board because for me, I will always have a request for God, so I will continue to keep that magnet, with my name on it on the request wall.
2010, wasn't just about me. I was able to witness my brother Rashad, graduate from JCSU in May with a Bachelors Degree. What an accomplishment! I am so proud of him. I pray and hope he continues to grow into a successful young man that will make a difference in whatever it is that he pursues. I was able to witness my young cousin Ashley graduate from high school and go on to attend Itacha Community College. Hopefully, one day she will follow her dreams and become a Chef. I witnessed my cousin/Goddaugher, AaTani turn one years old in November. As her mother may have some struggles, she knows that her family will always be there to assist. I finallllly got through to my cousin that the corporate world isn't for him. He is now on the track of pursing his dreams and utilizing his many talents to become his own business owner. I was able to gain some new friends (hi, Nan), and at the same time lost some.
Well, in short, these are some of the things that has taken place in 2010. I pray that my family, friends, and I have continued blessings, good health, and prosperity in 2011. Sky's the limit!!!

ABUSE

Often times throughout our lives we experience many daunting tasks and situations. Some of them because of mistakes that we make, others which have been brought on by others for reasons unknown to us. I myself have experienced this in my life. It came at the hands of someone very close to me. It took years of pain, regret, and fear before I was able to come out of that "abuse" stage of my life. Fortunately for me, I was able to come out of that dark area of my life through the grace of God along with other intervention methods. I write this with the hope that it finds its way into the soul of someone whom may have been abused-sexually, physically, emotionally or whatever the case may be, to greater heights to overcome it. For me personally, I have taken many steps. One of my most recent steps, that took over a year to make technically, but even more time mentally, will be televised on the local community cable access channel; RCTV 15 (Rochester Community Television-Channel 15) on Monday December 6, 2010 at 9:30 pm and again on Wednesday December 8, 2010 at 6:30 pm. My hope is that this meaningful documentary will help someone take the proper steps to overcome their abuse or help someone that maybe going through it. Please, take the time out to recognize, understand, reflect, respect, and listen to that someone who may be having a problem. You never know, you maybe that missing link that will help them overcome the situation. Never be too busy to help. Reach out. You may save someone's life.